22 weeks and venting again...

Just after Thanksgiving and I don't want to appear ungrateful. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for so many things right now. Here are a few, for example. First, I am thankful that I am still pregnant. I think all of my doctors are too because they both said so. It is a miracle in itself that this is even possible. Generally 9 out of 10 cases of women whose membranes rupture, usually all end in the loss of their pregnancy. So I am indeed thankful that I am one of the lucky ones that has made it this far. The next thing I have to be thankful for is that I am 22 weeks along this journey today. 22 weeks is a magic number because Ryleigh is on the brink of viability (for lack of a better term). There are some known cases of babies who have survived being born at 22 weeks. Every day after this is a huge blessing. When we get to 24 weeks, chances are even better for us. I have so many other blessings in my life that there are just too many to mention. I could literally, go on forever.

Now the reason I am so angry today. My uncle Jim who lives in Quincy is very sick and it is not looking good right now that he will make it. He had a stroke a few weeks ago and has now developed pneumonia. He is back in ICU and there has apparently been discussions of putting him on a ventilator. Basically, this means life support. Now, I am really close to my aunt and uncle. They are my mom's only living relatives that I know. So basically they have, in a way, taken some role as parents to me. I want to be at home right now to be there for him. I am stuck on this stupid couch and cannot go anywhere. If something bad happens, how can I get home? It would require me travelling 2 hours to Quincy which I am sure my doctors would frown upon with good reason and if something happened to me while I am at home, there is no hospital there that could take care of me or Ryleigh. So this really sucks and once again, I am feeling very helpless. I want to go home but for the sake of my baby, I can't. Now, I know that everyone says that God never gives you more than you can handle. But come on, really??? What impeccable timing God has here. Can't we just please have one crisis at a time??? Excuse me if I am a little angry right now but I just can't seem to help it.