Happy Anniversary to us!

Well, we celebrated our two month LID last week. That means that we have been logged in with China for two months. I am going to be really, really optimistic when I say this but... 2 down, hopefully only 22 to go. That would put us in China to get our daughter in 2009. Our anniversary date was 4/25. Guess how we celebrated? We went out for Chinese food of course. Really, it was an excuse so I would not have to fix dinner. Don't worry though, since we are going to have to wait longer than we first expected, my list of things to do around the house is getting longer. Also, Dwaine told me today that maybe we will get a new car for ME next year!

That leads me into the next topic. Ryan is driving now. Not just driving us crazy either. Driving a vehicle. OOOHHHH, SCARY!! Actually, he does pretty well. He will be 16 in June and able to get his driver's license. He is driving on a permit now and can only drive if a parent or guardian is with him. Naturally, I don't want to deprive Dwaine of this monumental occasion so I am letting him do that. When I get a new car, we will give my Corolla to Ryan. I do love that car, though.

We are planning another trip to Jersey in June. Carrie is going to be in the Miss New Jersey pageant again this year. I am looking forward to the trip. We are staying in Ocean City, right by the ocean. I am really proud of Carrie. She has so much ambition and talent and she puts it all to good use. So, keep her in your prayers. Last year, she made the top 10, let's hope that this year she goes all the way to the top!

That is all for now, we have all been happy and healthy here. Hope you all are too.

Kelley & Dwaine

I've got the adoption blues...

Hello everyone,

I know I haven't posted for almost 2 weeks. There really hasn't been much to report. However, this week on the adoption front hasn't really been a great week. As of right now, those who are travelling to China to get their children have been waiting around 18 months. The wait has doubled just in the last year or so. China has a very reputable program and a lot of people want to adopt from China. Now with the great rush of dossiers heading to China, they can't hardly keep up. Also, their government is telling the world that there just aren't enough children be matched with the vast numbers of families who are applying there. The government only adopts out a certain percentage of children per year and there are a huge number of orphanages who are not open to foreign adoption. This means that the children who are not made available for adoption pretty much spend their lives in the orphanages there. Since the number of adoptive families wanting children is greatly increasing and the number of children being let out of the country is not, the predicted wait times for us is potentially 2 1/2 - 3 years. We have only been logged in for 2 months which means that we will more than likely have to wait another 28 months or so. The only thing that will help is if the Chinese government does something to speed up the process or make more children available for adoption.

Now I am thinking the worst. I just want a baby, if we have to wait that long, I will be 43 and Dwaine will be 53 before we get our daughter. If you think about that long term, Dwaine will be retired by the time she reaches high school. Another thing that I think about is the fact that we kind of wanted to adopt twice, if we have to wait that long, we will both be disqualified from adopting from pretty much any country because we will both be too old.

We are just asking for your prayers and support. Pray that the wait speeds up and that we will travel before we are both headed for the nursing home. I try not to be pessimistic but this week, I just can't really help it. I am still so grateful for the opportunity to adopt, I just wish it would be a better scenario. I keep thinking that if we could have our own children, we could have had a couple by then. Heck, we started our paperwork in August of last year, I could have had a baby by now already.

Thanks everyone for listening to me go on, I guess it is just part of the process. Thank you all for your prayers and support.

Love,

Kelley & Dwaine

A few more pics...

Please take note of the one in the middle. That one is my favorite. There is no need for any form of complicated birth control, just put these glasses on and no one of the opposite sex will want to come near you. Maybe that's why we don't have our own children. Hmmm.....

The one on the left is from Chris' birthday and the other one on the left is our Easter dinner together. Needless to say, we all ate way to much!

Well, that's it for now, until later...

Kelley & Dwaine

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter everyone! I know it is a little past Easter but wanted you to know that we send you Easter wishes.

Just want to update you on a few things just around the house. Not any big news just Spring things. A couple of weeks ago, Chris came down and spent his 22nd birthday with us. He brought his new puppy which we dog sat for while he was in Chicago for the weekend. He is a really cute puppy , very energetic to say the least. We met Chris' new girlfriend too. She is a very sweet girl. We spent the day opening gifts, and we went out to eat at a Japanese restaurant in town. Then we came back to the house and had birthday cake. It was a fun, relaxing day.

We are getting ready to do a few home improvements. We had an estimate for new kitchen cabinets and remodeling our basement. We are going to put another room in our basement and add a shower to the downstairs bathroom. I can't wait until it is all finished.

Spring is here and we are frantically doing yard work. So far we have mowed 3 times and we need to do it again if it ever warms back up. It has been below freezing here this last weekend. Needless to say, all of my outdoor plants have kicked the bucket. My dogwood tree had some beautiful blooms on it this Spring as did another tree in our front yard. I don't know what kind of tree it is but it was really pretty.

I will try to post a few more pictures later. I am still trying to get the hang of how this works. For now, know that we are doing well and we hope you all are too.

Love,

Kelley & Dwaine

Kisses in the Wind

KISSES IN THE WIND
I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.
I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.
Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.
May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.
Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.
May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.--- Unknown

Steps involved in the adoption process

For all of those who are wondering just how the adoption process works, here's a little explanation of the steps involved.

1. First, you talk to a social worker and decide how you want to adopt. There are two options- domestic adoption and international adoption. We looked at both options. Believe it or not, we are really too old to qualify for domestic adoption. Most agencies seem to push open adoption or at least that seems to be the most common. Most couples must be in their 30's to adopt domestically. That is one reason we chose international. Once we chose international adoption, then we picked which country we wanted to adopt from. Most countries have different regulations and restrictions which you must meet. We chose China because we meet the age restrictions and also because their government's adoption policies are very regimented. No surprises or bribing of judges etc. They treat all adoptive parents equally. The babies are usually healthier and have more medical history than babies adopted from other countries. So we know we will more than likely adopt a healthy girl between the ages of 7 months to 24 months. That is what we qualify for.


2. After we spoke with a social worker from Lutheran Family and Children Services (LFCS) here in town, they directed us to an agency which deals with Chinese adoptions. We chose Chinese Children Adoption International (CCAI). They deal only with Chinese adoptions and are very well known with the Chinese government. They will take care of the international comings and goings.


3. Next we sent our application in to CCAI and were approved to be their clients. Now the real paperwork begins.


4. We needed to compile our dossier (I think this is a French term for "butt-load of paperwork") which consists of many documents which all must be notarized, certified by the secretary of state where the document originated and then they must be authenticated by the Chinese consulate for our region (which is in Chicago). The documents we needed to get were birth certificates, marriage certificates, police clearance reports, passports, employment verification, an income statement, physical exams, an adoption petition and a home study which was done by our local agency, LFCS. The home study consists of a social worker inspecting every aspect of your lives from you income to your pet's vaccinations to your functioning smoke detectors in your home. They examine you through a magnifying glass. We also needed to apply for qualification from the US government to adopt an orphan from China and another background check and fingerprinting by the US dept. of immigration This form is called a I171-H. This is the golden ticket to the adoption process. Once we got this form, (which is a real pain because you have to deal with the US immigration office and believe me, they are not in any big hurry to accommodate you) then we sent all of these things to CCAI.


5. CCAI takes everything from here. They check all of your documents to make sure they are worded properly and contain accurate information that the Chinese government will need. Once the dossier passes critical review then they translate all documents from English to Chinese. They send the dossier to China and once China receives the dossier, they log you in. This is the precious log-in-date or LID. This date puts us "in line" to receive our baby. There are many people who are logged in. They match children with the next adoptive parents who are "in line". So it is kind of first come, first serve in a way. There are not as many children available as there are dossiers that are logged in. Now, the wait from log in to match is about 18 months. We expect that as we continue on, the wait will get longer by the time we are matched with our daughter. We are probably looking at around a 2 year wait.

Here is our time-line so far:

• Our application was approved by CCAI 8/2/06


• Our dossier was finished and received by CCAI on 2/2/07 (yes, it takes that long to get the paperwork together)


• Our dossier was mailed to China on 2/6/07


• Our log in date or LID is 2/25/07

Now here is the kicker, you remember that I171-H? Well, that form has to be valid throughout the waiting period and our trip to China to pick up our daughter. The waiting period is going to be over 18 months. The I171-H expires 18 months after you receive it. So before we go to China, we will have to renew that form which means that we will have to be re-fingerprinted, update our home study and have another physical (and of course pay the government another fee for the form).

Our fingerprints expire on 2/9/08 and our I171-H expires 7/9/08. We will be travelling hopefully sometime toward the end of 2008.

This is our pregnancy period. No physical side effects but a lot more paperwork and hoops to jump through. I prefer to call it paper pregnancy. I don't have swollen ankles but I think I have carpal tunnel from all of the paperwork we have filled out.

Now you know how it works...

Thanks for checking out the blog.

By the way, we think we are going to change the spelling of Rileigh to Ryleigh. We are still playing around with the idea. What do you think? Leave a comment and let us know.

Kelley & Dwaine

A poem

We Are So Blessed.

We have the opportunity to pray and wait and plan and hope and dream and work for our child. Circumstances don't allow us to take our child for granted - ever. We do all these things for so long and at such great emotional cost, that when our child is finally in our arms, we truly cherish every minute. Every second...

We are blessed to be in our child's life. We are blessed that God planned for us to be a family, and that we were given the opportunities that brought us together. We get to see all the best parts of mankind in our wonderful children. All the goodness and potential and innocence and ambition and confidence and love. And what a beautiful sight that is...

We are blessed to have run this race. It is long and, very often, it is practically impossible to complete. But we run anyway, and believe in ourselves and our child enough to do the impossible. We run, knowing that at the end of this great race, a child is waiting for a chance at a wonderful life. And we get to be the ones to give her that life.

We are blessed that when our child laughs, we are the ones to hear it. And when our child cries, we are the ones she looks for. When our child feels pain or joy or accomplishment or excitement, she shares it with us.We are so blessed to have had the chance to see life from a different angle. To see that things don't always go as you planned them out in the 5th grade- but that better things are in store. To be part of the few who feel constantly misunderstood. To be one who always has to be on guard against the rude and ignorant comment. To feel the frustration of not having the perfect comeback to that comment until three hours later. Our kids can use those experiences and lessons we have learned. We are deeper, stronger, more compassionate people because of this journey. And the world our children live in is better because we have grown in these ways.

Our child is blessed. She is patted and hugged and nestled and rocked and kissed and squeezed and taught and tickled and corrected and praised. She is told of her value in God's eyes. She is certain of her value in our eyes. And she never wonders if she will be cared for tomorrow or the next day...she sleeps comfortably each night, safe in our care.

We should tell our children we are proud. We have saved and scrimped, prayed and begged, planned and schemed, worked and worried, and hoped endlessly for them. We have dedicated years of our lives to finding them and bringing them home to their forever family. And we have given our whole hearts to them even before we ever saw that precious face.Now that is love. And parents who adopt know all about that...

Author unknown